There's nothing I hold onto. I desire to die to myself, to fully receive your Grace but it seems my flesh desires things in selfish pride, in my need to relieve others of suffering and be their "savior", and I am motivated by my ulterior motives. It is true that I am able to say I'm dead to all of these things because of your Grace? How much love You must love me with, that one man would make a way into Your presence, make a way to righteousness; not only for me but for all of humanity. This love. I cannot begin to fathom it, and at the same time, I long to drown in an ocean of it.
I long to venture down into the very depths of it. I know there are moments when I'll be afraid, and fear for my life. When doubt strikes me with fear and I begin to feebly attempt to breathe on my own, when I realize that I am suffocating myself in my own pride to do it on my own, Your Grace will breathe life into my tired and weary soul. Deeper. I want to go deeper into Your love. Won't You take me deeper? Because I don't just wonder about more of You or even merely want it. I'm coming to a place of complete and utter desperation for more of You, for all of You.
Set free from the law, its no longer sacrifice you require but a humble and contrite spirit. In the weakness and wretchedness of my self, of my flesh; I cannot carry out what my spirit, the new creation You've made me to be, desires. But in the Grace You pour out, I'm able to do and experience more than I could ever possibly imagine. Seeds can be sown in love and truth, a harvest can be reaped. Blind eyes can be opened, hardened hearts softened, lives transformed, Your Kingdom advanced.
Yet, in my brokenness and filth, I seek honor and glory for myself. Why? I read the Word You've called Your own and see that I can be transformed by the renewal of my mind through Grace. Why do I hold on and try to keep what needs pruned and plucked, thrown into the fiery furnace and burned away? Manifest the truth that my most righteous acts are like filthy rags. That I might lay my spirit and physical body, that which You call Your temple, prostrate in the dirt with my hands turned to reflect every every ounce of Glory back to You.
I need You. I need You to come and change my heart, my spirit to be more in the likeness of You. You say I have the mind of the One You called Your own. To be honest, I mock that truth at times, because I know the disgust that goes on within my own mind, how could the two ever correlate? But in my spirit, I believe it. Fill my mind with thoughts like those of Your faithful Son. Thoughts of compassion, of counting everyone else as more significant than myself, of servanthood, and ultimately a mind set on bringing Glory to You and You alone.
Breathe Your presence on me. Surround me completely. I long to enter into the quiet place. The secret place where I can year you speaking to me. Take me to the place where only You and I can know. The place where intimacy reaches depths that I have never known before. Im calling out to You. Do you hear me? Will you come to me, for I am crying out for more of You. To no one else can I turn, for the lesser loves leave me broken, hurt and empty. The momentary satisfaction they provide never fully satisfies. But You, Oh how You satisfy, for that is Your promise to me is it not? That You alone can satisfy.
Forgive me, for my heart and mind have turned their back on You. I have been adulterous. I even dare say i've whored myself out to lesser loves than You. Who am I, that You would take me back into Your arms? That id hear You say "you're pure and perfect to Me, beloved"? Of these things I cannot understand. The vastness of this love I care to call my own strikes fear in my soul, yet beckons be to surrender all I am and dare to be drawn near.
My mind reminds me of my unworthiness, of the filth that exists within but for a moment that seems like an eternity at times, but I turn away as I come to the realization of how undeserving and depraved I am and how you still am called into Your love by this Grace that never ceases to leave me perplexed and in wonderment. It calls my name again. My head hung low in shame is lifted by the hands that have been pierced for my redemption, my salvation, that purchased my eternity.
Of this love, I'll never get enough. But still, I long for more. I'm so undeserving of all You are. Yet, You're so deserving of all my love. My life. My everything. So, though I know I'm prone to wander, prone to turn away. I pour out myself. With Everything. Would You take it all? My hands are open, take what you want. Take what keeps me from You and give me more of You. Give me strength to chose to soak up Your Grace and the ability to receive all You have for me.
I'm crying out to You. May my life reflect Your love, which is enough. It's all I want to want, for I know it's all that I need. Here I am. Life laid before You. Would You come?
I long to venture down into the very depths of it. I know there are moments when I'll be afraid, and fear for my life. When doubt strikes me with fear and I begin to feebly attempt to breathe on my own, when I realize that I am suffocating myself in my own pride to do it on my own, Your Grace will breathe life into my tired and weary soul. Deeper. I want to go deeper into Your love. Won't You take me deeper? Because I don't just wonder about more of You or even merely want it. I'm coming to a place of complete and utter desperation for more of You, for all of You.
Set free from the law, its no longer sacrifice you require but a humble and contrite spirit. In the weakness and wretchedness of my self, of my flesh; I cannot carry out what my spirit, the new creation You've made me to be, desires. But in the Grace You pour out, I'm able to do and experience more than I could ever possibly imagine. Seeds can be sown in love and truth, a harvest can be reaped. Blind eyes can be opened, hardened hearts softened, lives transformed, Your Kingdom advanced.
Yet, in my brokenness and filth, I seek honor and glory for myself. Why? I read the Word You've called Your own and see that I can be transformed by the renewal of my mind through Grace. Why do I hold on and try to keep what needs pruned and plucked, thrown into the fiery furnace and burned away? Manifest the truth that my most righteous acts are like filthy rags. That I might lay my spirit and physical body, that which You call Your temple, prostrate in the dirt with my hands turned to reflect every every ounce of Glory back to You.
I need You. I need You to come and change my heart, my spirit to be more in the likeness of You. You say I have the mind of the One You called Your own. To be honest, I mock that truth at times, because I know the disgust that goes on within my own mind, how could the two ever correlate? But in my spirit, I believe it. Fill my mind with thoughts like those of Your faithful Son. Thoughts of compassion, of counting everyone else as more significant than myself, of servanthood, and ultimately a mind set on bringing Glory to You and You alone.
Breathe Your presence on me. Surround me completely. I long to enter into the quiet place. The secret place where I can year you speaking to me. Take me to the place where only You and I can know. The place where intimacy reaches depths that I have never known before. Im calling out to You. Do you hear me? Will you come to me, for I am crying out for more of You. To no one else can I turn, for the lesser loves leave me broken, hurt and empty. The momentary satisfaction they provide never fully satisfies. But You, Oh how You satisfy, for that is Your promise to me is it not? That You alone can satisfy.
Forgive me, for my heart and mind have turned their back on You. I have been adulterous. I even dare say i've whored myself out to lesser loves than You. Who am I, that You would take me back into Your arms? That id hear You say "you're pure and perfect to Me, beloved"? Of these things I cannot understand. The vastness of this love I care to call my own strikes fear in my soul, yet beckons be to surrender all I am and dare to be drawn near.
My mind reminds me of my unworthiness, of the filth that exists within but for a moment that seems like an eternity at times, but I turn away as I come to the realization of how undeserving and depraved I am and how you still am called into Your love by this Grace that never ceases to leave me perplexed and in wonderment. It calls my name again. My head hung low in shame is lifted by the hands that have been pierced for my redemption, my salvation, that purchased my eternity.
Of this love, I'll never get enough. But still, I long for more. I'm so undeserving of all You are. Yet, You're so deserving of all my love. My life. My everything. So, though I know I'm prone to wander, prone to turn away. I pour out myself. With Everything. Would You take it all? My hands are open, take what you want. Take what keeps me from You and give me more of You. Give me strength to chose to soak up Your Grace and the ability to receive all You have for me.
I'm crying out to You. May my life reflect Your love, which is enough. It's all I want to want, for I know it's all that I need. Here I am. Life laid before You. Would You come?
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